My daughter is a perfectionist. 

I have no idea where she gets it from.

There's been multiple examples of this and, to be honest, a lot of it is just typical preschooler behavior. For example: 

-Putting her clothes on in the same order every day and getting mad if I 1) try to help or 2) suggest something out of order.

-Building something with legos and not finding a color she needs. No other color will work in these situations, do not even try. 

-Getting some food on her hand or face while eating (we're talking a crumb or a speck of something) is unacceptable and she will not be able to continue eating until she wipes it with a napkin. A clean napkin. (This is in stark contrast to my son who literally shoves everything into his mouth with his hands and hates silverware.)

This is just who she is and I both love and hate it. Love it because I like that she knows what she wants and really knows what she doesn't; hate it because it can change without notice and suddenly I'm doing it all wrong, according to her. We've been working on compromising but let me just ask: Have you ever tried to teach a preschooler the art of compromise? As you can imagine, it's going fantastic.

One thing E loves to do is color. She can color for hours at a time. With crayons, markers, colored pencils...it doesn't matter. Because she's always doing it, her coloring has become (in my very impartial, motherly opinion) really good. I was quite impressed with her Thanksgiving turkey she colored from our local paper this past November. And this love did not stop when we were in Florida recently; when we weren't swimming or out doing things, she was always coloring.

This love of coloring is not a bad thing. I love that she loves it. It's a creative outlet for her. But then one day I gave her a blank piece of paper instead of a coloring book.

And she freaked out. 

She didn't want to draw, she wanted to color. There was no amount of encouraging, suggesting or modeling that was going to change her mind. To be honest, it wasn't a big deal; the girl knows what she likes to do. I just wanted her to feel comfortable expressing a little creativity. To not be constrained by the lines in a coloring book; to instead make her own lines. Which, apparently, was the worst idea, ever. So, I let it go and tried again another day.

And she freaked out. Again.

But this time she actually tried a little. She decided she'd draw some shapes. So she drew a big circle... and instantly burst into tears and pushed the paper away. When trying to understand what was wrong I got this between her sobs:

"It's ... not ... a ... circle ... it's ... an ... oval!"

Oh, my sweet little perfectionist. 

I tried to show her all the things that were awesome about ovals and all the things we could make from her oval shape, but it didn't matter. It wasn't a circle. And she just wanted to color. I once again let it go and tried again another day.

And she freaked out...but only briefly. 

She was more open to it and started drawing relatively quickly. Though our art session was cut short once again due to something not being exactly how she wanted it, we had a much more successful time.

Each time I tried, it got a little easier and she was more receptive. But it still felt like she wasn't enjoying it and that I was forcing it, which I didn't want to do. I wanted her to find joy in it and if it wasn't for her, that was ok. I kept encouraging because I felt like when she was actually letting down her guard and drawing, she was having fun. It was her perfectionism that kept stopping her. Her idea that something wasn't how it "should" be. And that's what I wanted to work on. 

So I decided to give her a notebook. Her own little space where she can draw anything she wants--she can practice writing letters and numbers, too, if she desires. Regardless, the notebook--or "Elena's Art Book"--is all hers. 

And she loves it.

She didn't quite understand what I was saying at first, and unfortunately the notebook I picked for her had some background pictures, so she initially thought it was a coloring book. But when I started drawing in my notebook and talking about all the fun things she could do, she got excited. This was her book. She could do whatever she wanted in it.

It's been fun watching her attention shift from coloring to drawing. She loves her "book" and loves to show off her work. She's proud of it. She's having fun. 

And that's all this momma was trying to encourage. It was a good parenting day. 

xo Sara

{P.S. Lest you think it's all sunshine and roses here at my abode, here's the time I told my kids it's ok to take candy from strangers.}