Tomorrow's my BIRTHDAY!!!!
I've always loved birthdays, specifically, MY birthday. I'm queen for a day! (Or a week, or a month--or always...)
This is what I wrote last year and I've found myself thinking about it a lot recently.
I love birthdays.
I celebrate every year and for the past six of those years I have turned 29.
It started with my actual 29th birthday and then since I couldn’t believe (or accept) I was turning 30 (or 31, 32, 33…) I just stuck with 29. Everyone knew how old I really was, I wasn’t fooling anyone. It became a joke. My annual 29th birthday party.
Until I had two realizations.
One, as a mother of a girl, I want to be a confident example to her. Which means no negative self-talk. No “I need to go on a diet” or “I hate my hair” or “I’m old”–girls have enough pressure and hear all those comments everywhere else. I want her home to a be a place of positivity and acceptance. That’s not to say I won’t feel those things, but I want to (try to) express them in a positive light. I do not want my negative words to become her inner voice. I want my confident, positive, accepting, loving and assertive words to become her inner voice.
And, two, I decided it was a lot easier, and much more pleasant, to age gracefully rather than fighting it every step of the way. We are all getting older. Isn’t it better than the alternative? Yeah, think about that for a moment…
Plus, to be honest, I’d rather be the age that I am now because of the person I am now. Just like when I was 29 I was better than when I was 21. Each year that I age I gain so much more than just another year. I gain confidence, knowledge, experiences, memories, children, friends… Why would I want to pretend that each year didn’t happen?
Tomorrow I'll be 37.
But I'm not sad about the bigger number, I'm celebrating it. I'm claiming my year.
Out loud I'll be embracing every gray hair (a sign of wisdom, right?), every bit of extra tummy flab (a couple of special kiddos were housed in there for a few months, it's not my fault they needed all that room) and every new line that draws itself deeper into my face over time (the lines of laughter).
In my head I'll know that I have a hair appointment scheduled, a workout plan to follow and a face mask and anti-aging cream to try.
Hey, I'm not perfect.
{P.S. If you want to see the entire post from last year, here it is.}
xo Sara