Parenting is hard. And messy. And, to be honest, gross sometimes.
One of my least favorite things about being a mom is potty training.
It's hard. It's messy. And it can be really gross.
When we started the process with our daughter, E, she was old enough to know what was going on, but not quite ready. We had a lot of accidents and it took more time than I thought it would. I was frustrated. She was frustrated. Nobody was happy.
And then it just clicked. A couple of months after we started, she just got it.
It was awesome.
And, as with so many things related to children including, but not limited to, birthing them, time fades the bad parts of things and the details get a little fuzzy. The good shines through. It's probably what gets us to have more kids.
Regardless, I figured with our son, B, being around E already trained that he'd understand and want to potty train earlier and that it would be super easy.
Oh, I was wrong.
As usual.
But it was funny, I really wasn't stressed about it. I had worried so much about getting E potty trained and after some of the negative repercussions from pushing her, I just wasn't interested in doing that with B. First baby verses second. I wonder what happens if you have 3 or 4...do you just never stress about anything? Do they just teach themselves?
So I was very relaxed about it. I would ask him if he wanted to try (NO!) or wear underwear (I just hold it). Family members would try, too (I try soon). E would encourage him. Copper even tried to get him to go--or he was just barking at a squirrel. It's hard to tell with him.
At some point this winter it dawned on me that my relaxed attitude about it, while not a bad thing, might need a little adjustment. Put to his own devices he may wait until he's in middle school. I mean, probably not, but he was certainly in no hurry. And he was getting quite manipulative about the conversations we would have about potty training. An example:
Me: B, would you like to try to go potty on the toilet?
B: NO!
Me: It's ok, I'll help.
B: No, I scared.
Me: It's not scary, we all do it! It's what big boys and big girls do! It's exciting!
B: Don't worry mommy, I go soon.
Me: Maybe we could try putting on the underwear?
B: No. I need a cuddle. Can you cuddle me?
Masterful.
So that went on for the winter months and I realized I was just going to have to put him in underwear. I was convinced that once he did it one time--accident or on the toilet--it would click.
But I didn't want to do that in the winter and have a house that smelled like pee.
I told you, kids are gross sometimes.
I decided to wait until spring. And then I would ambush him. Get the underwear on and go outside.
And share my screaming child with the neighborhood, because that's how awesome a neighbor I am.
So that's what I did.
Oh, and he screamed. He did not want that underwear on. He kicked. He cried.
But you know what's awesome about potty training?
Mommy gives you a LOT of juice. It's the one time where there aren't any limits to liquids.
You want juice? Ok.
More water? Of course.
Milk? Bottoms up.
More juice? Let me just fill up your cup.
Hot chocolate on this 70 degree day? Why not! YOLO, right?! {you only live once}
Gotta jump start that bladder.
It worked.
After several tries and realizing I was using the wrong word (he associated 'wet' with going potty because I would always ask him if his diaper was 'wet;' once I started using that word instead of 'potty' he understood), he did it.
And he hasn't looked back.
We started on Thursday afternoon. He had one accident that day. And none since. I don't even have to ask him if he needs to go, he tells me.
My relaxed attitude caused us to delay pushing him until he truly was ready. It has been such a smooth experience compared with E. I'm sure there will be messes and accidents in the future, but right now I'm basking in the "I'm an awesome mom and totally rock at potty training and I was right to not push until he was ready and I seriously rock, I wonder if my kids know how much I rock" glow.
One big caveat to all that: I haven't experienced the public bathrooms with B.
That should take that glow right away.
{P.S. This was my first item I've checked off of my 40 things to do before 40 list. To see the whole list, go here.}
xo Sara